Updated: Nov 9, 2020
Are You Playing The Blame Game
When it comes to making progress, often, we are our own worst enemies. That’s because it is easier to feel frustrated and defeated after having worked so hard but not seeing positive results. We end up blaming our outside circumstances for being stuck. News Alert - it could be our thoughts and actions that are holding us back. Ask yourself if, deep down, you don’t believe you’re capable or worthy of success.
If you are worried and anxious that you’ll never reach where you want to be, you might be dealing with self-sabotage and limiting beliefs. In this post, you’ll learn about five signs you’re self-sabotaging your prosperity:
What is Self-Sabotaging?
Self-sabotaging is when you want something, but you make subconscious decisions to prevent the objective from being achieved. Sounds cruel, right? You might not think you would ever be doing that to yourself. But your lack of prosperity is a good indication that you have some self-sabotage going on.
The problem is we love to blame external factors such as our job, partner, environment, or family. I used to consistently point my finger at my hubby for my world, not being perfect - shhh! Though all these things play a role in our success, you also have to take responsibility for our actions and avoid playing this blame game.
There could be a bazillion reasons you’re not feeling successful, but it’s often due to our thoughts and behaviors. The truth is, we may be our own biggest bully. In the process, we put ourselves down in front of others, let ourselves get distracted from our work, and think that we don’t deserve success. These are some of the things we all do that self-sabotage us from our prosperity.
It’s uber frustrating to feel like nothing you do is making any difference. It can feel like you’re pushing a boulder up a hill if you’re working to lose weight, develop a growth mindset, or build a kickass business. All these are a sign of self-sabotaging. You want to achieve something, but you end up making choices that prevent it from happening.
Go ahead and let out a huge “UGH.” Now that you’ve released a bit of steam, let’s discuss the five signs you are self-sabotaging your prosperity. Once you have awareness, you can begin to change things!
1. Your Personal Book of Laws
We all have a personal book of laws that we’ve created. These ‘laws’ are the mental barriers we subconsciously designed to keep us safe from embarrassment, shame, and rejection. One example can be avoiding leadership behavior. You may have experienced rejection as a youth when you attempted to challenge someone’s authority. All those years ago, you learned not to speak up too loudly because you’d be ridiculed. Today, you may see it as causing you to play small when your heart wants to soar. This idea is adapted from Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, ‘The Four Agreements.’
2. The Inspiration Trap
Searching for inspiration is a way to end up procrastinating without realizing it. Instead of getting started, we search for the answers before taking the first step. However, while searching for inspiration, we may feel even more overwhelmed as we either end up with nothing useful or information overload. In reality, we don’t need help from others to get our ideas going. Trust your growth mindset by digging into what you already know.
3. Overplanning - The Procrastination Tool
Planning is a stress-buster as it lets us get ahead before we get overwhelmed. However, the downside is it’s often used to avoid taking action. We develop a super detailed plan instead of acting on it because we like to use planning as a procrastination tool. It’s vital to be organized and also ensure that you’re taking action. Otherwise, we’ll end up wasting our time on writing a big, fat plan when we could have accomplished something on our to-do list.
4. Lack of Commitment - Shiny Object Syndrome
We all have experience starting something only to give up halfway through due to a lack of desired results. For instance, you started a blog, but no one read it. So you created a new blog in a different niche. If you’d given your first blog more time, most likely, you would have seen readership rise. Expecting instant and immediate gratification is a recipe for disappointment. Success happens when you commit to yourself and your ideas, even when it feels like nothing is happening.
5. Lack of Consistency
Spontaneity is the key to making your life fun, but consistency is vital for prosperity. If you lack routine in your work and behavior, you’ll find it tough to make progress. Maybe you say you’re going to complete a task. Either you completely forget or end up avoiding it. If you don’t have consistency in your life, you’ll always feel like you are playing catch up.
Remember my 3 A’s to transformation:
A - Awareness
A - Action
A - Accountability
Whenever you want to make a change, pull out the 3 A’s and create your blueprint to accomplish your goals! Check out this article for more details on the 3 A’s.
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